Can't Live Without Your Love
by Psycgurl
Summary: Post Celebration Day. Hyde sees Jackie on their anniversary and they eventually decide whether they want to be together again. J/H. R&R please.


**Title: **Can't Live Without Your Love****

**Chapter: **1/1 

**Author: **Psycgurl

**Email: **sikegurl@yahoo.co.uk

**Rating: **PG-13 (for some language)

**Pairing: **Jackie/Hyde

**Summary: **Suck at these, but basically Hyde remembers Jackie and his anniversary and that leads to some good ol' relationship talk between the two.

**Spoilers: **Post 'Celebration Day'- during the summer.

**Disclaimer:** Characters do not belong to me. No infringement is planned and no profit is made. Just written for plain old entertainment. 'Cos it was in the 70s and all- title is part of Ted Nugent's song "Can't Live With 'em"

**Distribution: **Ask me.

**Dedication: **To Katy, Daisy and Abby for being wonderful in their feedback and encouragement. 

**Feedback: **I totally dig it. Want it. Crave it. So please send it! ;)

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Covering her coloured orbs with dark shades, Jackie Burkhardt slipped into a lawn chair and grazed her bare legs with a coat of sun block. After adjusting the light blue strap on her bikini top, she leaned to her side and casually picked up her chilled multi-coloured drink. Jackie took a long sip of the drink, allowing the tangy taste to cool every vein in her body. She let out a sigh of pleasure as she lazily closed her eyes.

This was life, man. 

Jackie was experiencing the bliss available on a beach from the comfort of her own house. Sunbathing at the beach was _so_ overrated and Jackie definitely wasn't one to mingle amongst several sweaty, red people. Sitting next to her cool pool was better than the beach, which was always filthy, noisy and oh yeah there was also the congestion factor. The only reason she used to go was because of the hunky men, but this time Jackie really didn't need to go to the coastline to catch the attention of some beefy lifeguard with a killer six-pack. Realistically Jackie didn't see herself finding someone out of 'the group' as her boyfriend or her future. Jackie already knew that one of the two men that were bidding for her love at that moment would be the man she would spend her life with. But Jackie also knew that both of those men had hurt her emotionally and she wasn't the old Jackie that would ignore the past to create a future. The new Jackie Burkhardt had spent the better part of the last year as Steven Hyde's girlfriend and she had not only learnt the art of zen or how to be badass from him, but she had also learnt 'the ways' of Steven Hyde. And so she decided upon herself to milk this 'choice' between Kelso and Hyde for a little longer. It was her way of extracting sweet revenge on her cheating ex-boyfriends. 

One being Michael Kelso, her first boyfriend. He was the man she lost her virginity to and the first man she fell in love with. There was so much history between them, but to her all that ended the day he ran away from her. Looking back Jackie couldn't understand why she had let Michael back into her life and her heart after he first cheated on her. She should have followed her own advice and have their relationship end forever, but she knew she went back to him because she did love him. Michael was a big part of her life- her love life at that- and it was hard getting over him. She admitted to making a few slip-ups over the past year of her feelings for him like feeling jealous of his new girl. Jackie still had some feelings for Kelso, but they weren't the same as they used to be. Kelso used to be _everything_ to her and now he just felt like a close friend. Jackie knew that it was wrong for her to pretend that Kelso was even an option as a boyfriend. She _was_ over him, but she wasn't over the pain that he had caused her. Michael had made her cry a lot during and after their relationship and Jackie had still not gotten her revenge for that. He had wounded her so much that now having Michael pine for her love, making him think he still had a shot with her…it let her believe that she was finally letting Kelso get what he deserved. 

And as for Steven…she didn't know what she was going to do about him yet. That's what this summer was about. It wasn't about her spending time to think about whether she wanted Steven or Michael, but it was about what she was going to do with Hyde. Jackie knew that feigning Kelso as a choice wasn't only to play _him, _but it was also a way of avenging Hyde's infidelity. She wanted Steven to know what she had felt when he told her that he had been with another woman. Jackie knew that one of Steven's insecurities about their relationship was of Jackie's connection with Kelso. So, she wanted him to think that he had hurt her so much that she was willing to go back to the one man Hyde was always worried about. She wanted to hurt him by having him believe that she didn't love him anymore. 

But it was becoming really hard to do, because Jackie was still totally in love with Steven and she still wanted to so desperately be with him.

~*~*~*~

Steven Hyde sat in his usual chair in the Forman's basement alone staring at something situated on the table in the middle of the Forman's basement. Hyde usually felt like the loneliness _was_ him, but now it was just getting downright intimidating. It was already a few weeks into summer vacation and not one person was around. The usual crowded basement was utterly vacant and not one of Hyde's friends was there. There was no foreign boy's talk about candy and boobs or the spindly young man's rambles about 'Star Wars' or even the tall doofus' chat about his good looks. Hell, even the menopausal Kitty and her hardass husband weren't present in the Forman house. Hyde was completely alone and yet he didn't care about all his friends or his guardians' absences- he found himself thinking about one person daily. Only one person plagued every one of his thoughts.

His ex-girlfriend: Jackie.

Hyde was embarrassed and sickened by the strong feelings he harboured for Jackie. Love was not his thing. He had never been in love before and he had never cared for someone before, but after Jackie everything in his life had changed. He felt needed, he felt happy and he felt like he was in love. 

It had been a month since Jackie had broken up with him. One miserably long month after he had broken the young brunette's 'cold' heart. Yet, to that day he still loved her.  He knew that she didn't believe him when he had told her how he felt. After all by the time he had built up the courage to declare his love it was too late and he had given Jackie no reason to believe anything he was willing to say. Hyde hated the fact that his dumbass insecurities had not only driven Jackie away from him and caused her to lose any affection she had for him, but that they also drove Jackie straight back to Kelso. Hyde never thought that Kelso still had a shot with Jackie. If Jackie wasn't willing to take _him_ back after he cheated on her, why would she take back a man who deceived her _numerous_ times? But it became clear to Hyde the night before graduation day when he had, surprised, asked her whether she didn't know whom to pick between him or Kelso and her retort was 'no, she didn't know'. It was then he realised that Jackie had allowed the unfaithful Kelso to become a choice. 

A few weeks from that night and Hyde was beginning to grow impatient and uncharacteristically weak. He was actually worried of Jackie's choice. Now that he knew that Kelso was actually competition, he was afraid that Jackie would go back to him. After all, no matter what hardships they endured in their relationship in the past- Jackie had always gone back to Kelso.

It was this fear and not being with Jackie, not touching her, kissing her that was making the wait for her response unbelievably hard. Being without Jackie was becoming immensely tough for him…especially on this day. 

Hyde glanced back down at the piece of paper placed on the wooden table, a pen in his hand. He was unsure of what he was doing, as he scribbled some words. He didn't want to pressure Jackie on her decision. He wanted to give her space and time to think things through thoroughly. But, he also needed her to know how he felt. He needed her to realise that he was and had been in love with her and that he had cared a lot about her and their relationship. He wanted her to know how sorry he was for fucking up their relationship and that he wanted to be with her. So for the first time in his life Hyde allowed himself to be affected by the bullshit that multinational businesses created to sucker in lovesick people. 

For the first time in his life, Steven Hyde finally succumbed and sold his soul to the greeting card corporations.

~*~*~*~

Wrapping a sarong around her waist loosely Jackie trudged across the Oriental rug laid down in the hallway of her big house to the kitchen for another refreshment. She had been out in the sun for another whole morning and despite turning a goddess-like bronze, she was quickly becoming dehydrated. Although sunbathing in the luxury of her home was convenient it was finally starting to bore her. Jackie had already begun to miss her friends, the basement and most importantly, Steven. The lack of noise, the lack of marijuana smoke and the lack of love were finally starting to set in and Jackie was starting to feel completely alone. 

Suddenly the noise of metal clanking caught Jackie's attention. Clutching a new mixture of liquid in her hand, Jackie quickly returned to her doorway- the origin of the sound. She was just in time to see someone push a bright purple envelope through her mail slot causing it to land nicely on top of the previous stacks of crisp white letters. 

Jackie curiously leaned down and picked the envelope up, knowing full well that it was a card and not another one of the bank's 'URGENT: PAYMENT DUE' notices. She carefully ripped the seal and pulled out the glossy card. A small smile appeared on her face immediately, as she touched the picture of a pink unicorn on the front. 

God, she loved unicorns.

Jackie then slowly opened the card, unaware of who would send her a card in the midst of the summer holidays. Everyone that she was close to thought that she was on holiday in a foreign, exotic place. Jackie's eyebrows suddenly raised in shock as she read the card and realised whom it was from.

_-------_

_Jackie,_

Cards aren't my thing. Greetings aren't my thing. But you are, so… 

Happy Anniversary. 

Still sorry and missing you… 

_Hyde._

_-------_

Hot tears sprung to Jackie's eyes, as it dawned on her what day it was. She hadn't realised that a year ago today Steven and her had first begun their relationship by kissing on the Forman's couch.  Steven remembering that it was their anniversary, made Jackie realise that he still cared about her. Without hesitation Jackie quickly opened the door and called out after the retreating body, letting her heart take over her brain.

" Steven!" She yelled as she ran barefooted across the paved driveway to him. Hyde, surprised at hearing Jackie's voice, stopped and turned back to look at the young woman running uncomfortably towards him.

" Jackie? I-I thought you weren't here." Hyde wondered. " I thought you were at the beach."

" I-I've been at home all summer." Jackie breathed. 

" Really?" 

" Yeah, the beach was all icky." She simply replied.

" So have your parents come back?" Jackie turned away from him and looked down at the pavement.

" Ummm…no."

" So wait...is that why you didn't go? Because you don't have the money to?"

" Well…" Jackie began and then admitted. " Yeah. I'm slightly broke right now, but it's just a slump. Everyone gets those, even us rich people. So once Mom comes back, I'm sure it'll get better."

" You know you could've always come to me." Hyde stated, protectively. Jackie gave him a loving smile, until she remembered that Hyde wasn't her boyfriend anymore. 

" Ummm, how is everyone?" She quickly asked, changing the subject. Hyde gave her a concerned look, but answered her question.

" Eric and Donna have been at their apartment. Nice little joint. Got cockroaches in the tub though."

" Ewwww." Jackie squealed.

" Yeah. And Mrs. Forman took Red to a cottage somewhere, so they can both take some time off and not end up killing Laurie or Eric. And Fez and Laurie, well they…they're on their _honeymoon_." 

" Oh…_double_ ewwwww…" Jackie shrieked, as she scrunched up her nose. Hyde smirked.

" Yeah. And unfortunately Fez feels the need to get into major detail on the phone about every time they consummate their marriage." Hyde groaned and Jackie laughed. 

" You poor baby." She replied in mock comfort and the two smiled at each other. Jackie suddenly found herself getting uncomfortable- this wasn't the way the two of them had to behave.

" And what about Michael?" She asked after a while. Hyde's smile suddenly disappeared and he ran a hand through his hair uncomfortably. 

" Kelso? Well, he's uhhhh…" He stammered.

" He's what Steven?" 

" He's gone on a road trip. I guess he went to look for you."

" Really?" Jackie asked curiously. Hyde shrugged.

" Probably." 

" You just don't want to tell me the truth do you?" Jackie asked with an arched eyebrow. She then laughed. " It's okay. I know that Michael probably went off to find some summer blonde to spend the summer with. I'm not_that_ dumb." 

Hyde smirked, causing Jackie to hit him on the arm playfully and protest.  "I'm not!" After a long pause, Jackie then quietly added. " I ummm- got your card, Steven." 

" Oh. " Hyde said awkwardly. 

" Thank you. I love it. I-I can't believe you remembered." She exclaimed in awe.

" It's a day that stuck in my mind." Hyde smiled and then quickly replied. " But I don't want you to think I gave that card to you so you would pick me, Jackie. I just wanted you to know how I felt." Jackie shifted uneasily at Hyde's honesty. She knew that it was time for her to end her charade. With Michael gone off with some skankoid, it was pretty clear that there wasn't much choice anymore.

" Uhhhh- Steven. I need to come clean. There was never really a choice between you and Michael." 

" What?" Hyde exclaimed.

" Steven, when you cheated on me you hurt me so much.  I j-just…I needed something to make myself better. And watching you two fight over me, it was…it made me feel better. I do only love you, Steven but…"

" But _what_?" 

" This is hard for me okay? I feel so many things right now about our relationship and us. It's just really hard to go with one feeling." 

" So you played me?" 

" _No_! I ummm…played you _and_ Michael." Jackie stated.

" So if I was the only choice, does that mean we're gonna…" Hyde began.

" No, I mean yes. I mean…I d-don't know. I just don't know. Michael says we're over and I should move on, Donna says it was all a misunderstanding and I should be with you and Eric…" A stressed Jackie began explaining using hand gestures. 

" Jackie." Hyde calmed her down taking her hands in his and looked straight at her. "Kelso isn't here. Donna isn't here. Eric isn't here and Fez isn't here. Nobody's here. It's just you and me. And this is what it's all about. Not them or what they say. It's about _us_. Our problems. So ignore your family problems, ignore everyone else's opinions and…"

" And what?"

" Make your choice. Not a choice between Kelso and me anymore, but a choice between whether you want to forgive me or not. Because until you figure that one out Jackie we won't be able to get over _any_ of our problems." The two gazed at each other intently, until Jackie finally broke the stare.

" Steven, I _can't_ do that right now okay? Forgiveness is a hard thing. If I forgive you now for what you did, that leaves the door open for you to go do it again." 

" I made a mistake Jackie. And I'm sorry. I'll keep saying it, because I am. I am sorry, very sorry." 

" Steven…"

" But I'm not Kelso. You've got to stop thinking that I'm him, because you _know_ I'm not him. Yeah, I've hurt you and I did cheat on you, but I promise I will _never_ do that again. I won't ever even look at another woman, because I love _you_."

" That's not going to work, Steven. Just because you broke up with me once before and I said those words and we made up, doesn't mean that saying you love someone will get you out of _every_ fight." Jackie exclaimed as she backed up from him a bit.

" I'm not saying it just because I want to get back together with you, even though I do. Jackie, I've never told another girl in my life that I loved them, because I've never meant it before and I've never _felt_ it before. Believe me, you're the first girl that I've loved." He declared, pulling Jackie closer to him.

" Steven stop." She protested, but didn't leave his grip.

" C'mon Jackie, just give me another chance." He pleaded. 

" You say I'm the only girl you've loved. Well if that's true then why did you cheat on me?" Jackie choked out. Hyde stiffened and let Jackie go slightly. " If you _really_ loved me, then you would've come to me first. You would've confronted me about what happened at Donna's house rather than go and nail a nurse."

" I told you what happened, Jackie. I was angry." Hyde replied.

" Yeah, well I was angry when I broke up with you." 

" Jackie…"

" No you know what Steven, you can't take back what you did…" Jackie paused and looked straight through Hyde's sunglasses at him, tears building up in the corner of her eyes. " And I'm not going to take back what I did." She ended, turning on her around to walk away. Hyde stood watching he mass of brown curls face him, as Jackie's words settled in his mind.

" _What_?" Hyde asked, feeling as if every string in his heart had just been tug-of-warred with. He grabbed a hold of her and turned her back to face him. 

" I'm not going to take back breaking up with you. I've made my choice Steven. I _don't_ forgive you." Jackie determined.

" Wait Jackie. You _can't_ do that." He objected, showing a weaker side to him than usual as he kept a hold of her wrist. 

" I just did. It's for the better, Steven. We weren't going to be together in the future as it is. I'm rich and you're _not_. We're totally mismatched." She replied.

" I'm not going to fall for that Jackie. I'm not going to let you pretend that we were nothing."

" Well maybe Steven that's what we really were. Maybe it's always been nothing with us. Maybe that was the real problem we had." Jackie declared, but the words that were meant to come out strong were broken between sobs. She was trying everything she could to convince herself she was making the right decision. Her mind was sure she had, but every other part of her body was aching to be with Steven. 

" Jackie, you know that isn't true. Man, you're even crying!" He declared and then it dawned on him and a small smile appeared on his face. 

" Y'know I'm surprised we didn't break up earlier, what with there being nothing between us. A-and like t-those glasses you're wearing. They look cute, but you just look stupid wearing them at night. They're _sun_glasses!" She cried. Hyde watched Jackie continue to whimper more outrageous reasons as to why they couldn't be together, knowing full well that they were a bunch of crap. She still wanted to be with him, he could tell, but she was just too stubborn to let herself believe it. Letting his heart lead his movements, he leaned forward and pulled her Jackie into him again- enveloping her in a hug. 

" A-and I hate how your curls are so curly and how you never t-took me to the movies or…" Jackie cried into his shirt. 

" I'll take you to the movies, Jackie." He replied as he stroked her back.

" Really?" She asked hopefully, looking up at him.

" Yeah, I'll even go see some chick flick for ya." 

" What? No 'Star Wars'?" 

" Nah. I'll go see anything you want." He said, as he pushed strands of her glossy hair away from her wet face. She smiled at him warmly and he returned the gesture. Hyde then leaned down and let his lips linger a few inches away from Jackie's.

" Steven, we can't…" She began, but was stopped from uttering any more words as Hyde captured her mouth. Every one of Steven Hyde's kisses always left her tingling, even the one (despite what she said) they shared many years ago on Veteran's Day, and this was one was no different. Ignoring her mind and its beliefs Jackie allowed herself to be kissed, and eventually began to kiss Hyde back. When they had broken away, due to a lack of oxygen, Jackie spoke again softly.

" Wow, Steven. T-that was…I mean but I c-can't…" She stammered, but was interrupted by Hyde.

" Jackie, I can't let my stupid mistake break us up okay? I _need_ you. Man, I sound like Forman, but I do _need_ you. I've been sitting in that basement for the past few weeks just thinking of you. Just _you_." 

" You need me? Really?" Jackie asked in awe.

" Yeah." Hyde repeated, holding Jackie's hand. " And I understand that it's hard for you to forgive me…"

" I don't think you do, Steven. This is _killing_ me." Jackie cried.

" I do alright? I know it's hard to forgive the people you care about for their dumbass mistakes. My parents bailed on me and I know that it's damn hard for me to forgive them," He sighed. " But that's why I also need you to forgive me. B-because, I don't want you to leave me too. All my life people have left me alone. Hell, I'm completely alone right now. They all left me- and I let them. But I'm not going to let you go too." Hyde declared, not caring about what his reputation was meant to be. He loved that ice-capade-attending-brunette dammit and if opening up to her was a way of getting her back, then he was willing to go down the 'Forman road'.

" I don't want to leave you, Steven. I want you so much." Jackie admitted and then suddenly gave a small scream. " Ahh, why is this so hard? I want to be with you, so why can't I be with you? When I talked to Donna and Eric, I told them that it was nice to be needed. And I thought you didn't need me, but you do, so why the hell am I resisting being back in your arms? I love you and I need you. And you love me and need me." She moaned as she caressed his hand and looked up at him. " So why can't we be back together?"

" You're telling _me_?" Hyde remarked dryly and Jackie rolled her eyes. 

" This is important, Steven." She said sternly.

" Well in my opinion if we both want to be together- then we just should _be_ together."

" But- the trust? Steven, we've lost trust in each other. How will we make our relationship work again if neither of us believe in the other?"

" I don't know." He replied simply. " But if you let us have another shot, I'm sure we'll work on it. We can get through it. Just…just give us another shot. Give me another shot, Jackie."

" Will you ever hurt or cheat on me again?" Jackie asked accusingly.

" No. _Never_. I promise." Hyde retorted quickly.

" Good. Well then…" Jackie contemplated, cueing a dramatic pause. 

" Man, come on!" Hyde prompted in annoyance. Jackie giggled and then took his hand and encircled it around her waist.

" Fine Steven. I'll give you- give us another shot. I'll be your girlfriend again, but it will take me a while to trust and forgive you okay?" 

" So I'm like _never_ going to get some from you am I?" Hyde joked, as he played with her hair.

" No." Jackie confirmed with a smile.

" Can't blame a guy for trying." Hyde responded. The two, newly reunited couple, then shared a kiss- one signalling the beginning to a new relationship that would eventually include trust and hopefully no slutty nurses.

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Fin

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